Letter from the Hell Hole

At Joy's request (the first official b-school person to explore my blog), I'm posting this in the little break between my interview and the wine tasting Happy Hour.

"Well, I'm back in the hell hole (Harrisburg or prison? jk Harrisburg people). I got denied the SIP program because the fight i was in (shocking) which is ridiculous (is it? is it really that ridiculous that you got kicked out of your treatment program for fighting?) but oh well everything happens for a reason. I really didn't want to do that program. (that's what losers say when they don't get something they really want. 'I really wouldn't have known what to do with a million dollars anyway.')

I hope you can figure out where to go for spring break (thinking warm...thinking warm). you should go to Mexico, its pretty cheap there! (so...if you ever go on the run, I'm thinking they should get a notice out to the border patrol?) I want to go to cancun for springbreak sometime so I can be on MTV and meet some rappers. (in the words of my mom 'you have to actually have a springbreak to go on springbreak).

How much is a normal gym membership? when I come home I want to join a gym with tanning beds so I can shape up and tan. (really? your big concern when you get out of jail is getting a tan? Someone's been watching too much Jersey Shore. GTL, baby. GTL.) I've been in jail for 14 months now (14 months of fantastic letters). I'm going crazy. If you have ever have a chance and you take some pictures of the campus and your apartment and send em to me (so I can case the joint and rob you when I get out)? Well I guess I'm gonna go. Miss you."

Fun times... fun times.