Disney World, the Final Chapter

Ok, My New Year's Resolution is to finish this series because its taken WAY too long to finish it.

Where were we? Oh yeah, Paradise Island. So the show at the Comedy Club was ok, but because we were already tipsy, it was HYSTERICAL. From there we went to the BET club (because we had agreed we were checking out all the clubs) and to our surprise, it was full of old white people. Go figure! We then went to the Adventurer's Club which is modeled after an English Gentleman's club except with a bit of a Disney twist. Picture talking masks on the wall. Danielle had another Long Island (3) and I had a Amaretto Sour (3). We were ushered into the "library" for a little Christmas show which again was funnier than it should have been due to the "merriment" that we had been having. Danielle kept interrupting the show by continuously whispering "I gotta pee." So after the show our first course of action was finding a bathroom, but the first bathroom was not adequate because it was too crowded and according to Danielle there was "too much pressure." We found a less pressure packed bathroom.

We continued our trek across Pleasure Island at 8Trax, the disco club. We managed to stay just long enough to see the ridiculous light up dance floor and be hit on by some creepy, questionably straight guy. We went next door to Mannequins the "techno club" which apparently doubles as a gay club (at least while we were there). We actually stayed there longer. Tried out the revolving dance floor where there was according to Danielle lots of "penis on penis gay action." We also realized we needed another drink, so we went to the bar. Two gay guys recommended the bartender Robbie because he is awesome and decorates your glass. The guy showed us his cup which said "I'm hot" in pink sharpie. Robbie asked us if we wanted doubles and of course we said sure. Actually I think Danielle's exact words were "Hell Yeah!" I had a double tequila sunrise (5) and Danielle had a double Mambo Punch (5) which came in a really cool glass because it was a signature drink.

We left Robbie and moved onto Motion (the Top 40 club). It was pretty lame. No one was dancing except for one techno guy who seemed to belong back at Mannequins. We left there pretty quickly and went to our last club of the evening the Beach Club. Hip Kitty was playing and sounded pretty good so we found a pair of benches on the second floor and I went and got this:

Filled with liquor! Actually it was filled with a Funmeister, which the bartender recommended. I'm not sure what's in a Funmeister. Some melon stuff, maybe some sour mix...I don't know. It was kinda sour and yummy. Just as I begin enjoying my bucket, a creepy guy with no teeth who smells like tobacco pounces on us. He had a non creepy kinda cute friend but he didn't really do anything but stick back. The best part was that Danielle was drunk and so was perfectly content speaking her mind. At one point, the creepy guy said "Come on, I want to show you a good time." To which Danielle responds sarcastically "I'm sure you do." Another time the creepy guy was in between us, and has his arms (ICK!) around both of us and while talking was not exactly looking at our eyes to which Danielle yelled "Are you looking at boobies?" Creepy guy then at one point asked where we were staying. Danielle blatantly paused and then pulled "The Swan Club" out of her ass. To her credit The Swan is a Disney hotel. Creepy guy eventually gives up, kisses each of us on the cheek (any disinfectant around?) and leaves. We hang out a little more. Danielle makes some drunk phone calls and drunk text messages before we also decide to call it a night. On the way out our gay friends from Mannequins, tell us to go get my bucket filled by Robbie.

Thank God for WDW transportation. We try not to be too loud or act like too big of fools as we ride the bus back to the hotel with people much younger than us. I think we did ok except that I kept turning to Danielle, pointing to my bucket and saying "I drank that." We get back to our room and Danielle passes out on top of the bed spread, in her clothes, next to her pajamas that she had laid out before we left, with her feet on her pillow and her head at the bottom of the bed. I change, brush my teeth and say "are you just going to stay like that?" "uh-huh." Then I took a picture.

The next day was the day we left. We went to check into our flight at our hotel but they only had my reservation on the flight and not Danielle's. After calling US Air three times, we confirmed that she did have a reservation. We were switched to a flight through Philly, instead of Charlotte, but other than that got home safe and sound.

The End